PJA’s Guide to Getting Through Heartbreak

Yes, I know, that’s one serious title! Thought it was about time for me to address some more serious issues here on PJA.

Image courtesy of drugsandplastic.

This comes in lieu of my own heartbreaking story. Don’t worry, I won’t bore you with the details. What I will say is this: there was someone I loved that greatly disappointed me. Their selfish and harmful actions have forever changed my opinion of them and, while I can forgive, there are some things I will never forget.

Now that we got that out of the way, lets get down to the nitty gritty! The following is a list of tips, a guide if you will, to help you through whatever hard times you find yourself in. Be it a cheating partner, a lost pet, or another momentous change in your life that throws you off your axis.

1. Rally the Troops

This is the time to call on your friends. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since you last spoke; your true friends will always come through with no harsh judgements and without conditions. Right now, you might find your self confidence deflated. Consider these people a reflection of your best self. They want to help and surrounding yourself with people that see you and your best qualities is a perfectly healthy way to boost your ego. When your spirits are lifted, don’t forget to show your gratitude for all the love they give you. Bake them something special or treat the troops to coffee.

2. Cry

Let it out! Listen to old, sad songs, watch sad movies, read old letters, whatever! Everybody’s gotta have a good cry every now and then. Take a day or two to wallow and heal.

3. Move

When you’re all cried out, get out of bed, get into some comfortable gym clothes, and get your butt into gear! I started running and, while I’m not the best runner and I barely clock in a full mile, listening to my workout playlist and pushing myself a little further with each step gives me such a high. Be it a dance class, a marathon, or just a walk around the block; do something that makes your heart beat a little faster everyday.

4. Be kind to yourself

During times of high emotional stress, I throw myself into whatever activity I can to take my mind off of whatever is bothering me. Sometimes, this method can backfire. You can feel drained, overworked, and even more stressed because you’re not taking enough time to take care of you. Recognize that you’re hurting and, while you’re a super star at whatever it is you do, sometimes you’re going to need a little help. Asking for assistance or taking a break isn’t a show of weakness. It’s called taking care of #1.

5. Focus on what really matters

It’s hard not to give your energy to something that completely rocks you. One day, you’re going to wake up and realize you’re wasting valuable time on something (or someone) that isn’t worth a second thought. Refocus that energy into getting to know yourself all over again because that’s time and energy well spent.

6. Count your blessings

When bad things happen, it’s hard to see the great things life has to offer. Take a moment everyday to express gratitude for the things you love in your life to get you prepared for the next phase. I like to write mine down in a little journal. When those sad thoughts creep up on you and the world looks bleak, pull out your list of blessings to remind you of all the beauty in your life.

I hope this simple list provides a little relief and perspective to those of you suffering from heartbreak. Remember: you’re not alone and you deserve so much more!

What piece of heartbreak wisdom would you like to share?

<3, PJA